How do I describe my pain, not by words.
Maybe by facial expressions, maybe by being silent
Nevertheless the pain is still here.
Should I give myself a pity party
I don't know maybe I don't have the right.
But at times my pain seems unbearable,

What does it mean to be loved unconditionally?
What does it mean when people don't abandon you, what does it mean when even with all your flaws someone really in your corner trying to cheer you on.

What does it mean when you are tired of swimming uphill, and dog paddling to keep afloat, but every now and then you sink.

But you get your head again just barely on the surface of the water then the storm comes and you begin sinking again, you look around for a life vest or a hand and there is none.

When you don't have a brother to confide in, you don't have a
Mother or Father and all those who see you make mockery of you.
He will never be anything,
But you try and try and for some reason.
It just doesn't seem to work.
What do you do, do you say maybe they knew or do you keep trying with no hope of success. I don't know.
But this is part of my pain.

When it seems as those around you have it together and you don't.
Even the cutthroats seem to have it more together than you.
What do you do when you have been giving all your life, to receive nothing in return.
Is this what's expected in this life?

What is love someone explain to me what am I searching for.
Is there really such a thing, or is this all made up TV propaganda as well,
Ever been an outsider looking in,
That's been the extent of my life this is the pain I feel.

© August 2005 Kwkau Omobamidele_ Ifayomi