The divorce rate is high in America even though the covenant and ceremonies of marriage remains a traditional past time. Out of 1,667,300 marriages performed in 1998 alone, more than half, 843,899 ended in divorce and almost half of those within the first year. Of course, the times are changing and the reasoning of many concerning marriage varies according to a persons needs and desires.

People marry for reasons other than love: this fact is evident according to the divorce rate. In other words, there is no other reason people divorce other than they did not love one another from the beginning. Some will say it began as love, but over the years - or the first few months - the love deteriorated somehow.

Some say that it is possible to fall out of love, but if that is the case then falling in love is worthless. If two people are put together by God - who sactioned the union of man and woman - the word divorce would never enter the couple's vocabulary. This theory is derived from the biblical concepts of promise and eternity. The relationship between a man and a woman is one of nature's most original and effortless commitments if pursued through the standards of the one whom created the union.

Women today appear to be having trouble finding a "good man", and men are having problems understanding what it takes to please a woman. There has not been a breakdown of the biological system causing both men and women to behave abnormally; on the contrary, the rules of society have changed to the point that the roles are confused.

As humans, we can still love and care-for and commit, but the reasons for which we choose to do the latter have changed. In other words, there are good men, but today the definition of a man is blurred, and it really does not take much to please a woman. However, with the many particulars of romance being introduced into society today, many women have know idea what should please her. In the mist of confusion, both males and females fall short of society's meaning of what marriage is suppose to be. But if entered into by the natural laws of nature, a marriage can last a lifetime and thereafter: and this is how.

A woman cannot find a good man because, first, they should not be looking for one. Traditionally, the man finds the woman; or in a more modern, politically correct definition, they find each other. Although according to today's standards thhe former concept violates the new-age norm of the woman's right to choose, and her right to independence, but this standard must be violated if love is to be involved.

Whether a woman chooses to live by the theories of the world or by the laws of love will determine her being espoused to the right man. If she looks, she will be looking in the direction of the world and according to the world's definition of what a good man is. Once she stumbles upon this societal-made, pseudo-definition of a man, he will be everything the world said he would be. Nevertheless, underneath all that the world said he would be is in fact, himself.

When she discovers the real him and he is not what the world said he would be, regardless of who he really is, she will not be satisfied. He will not be doing what the world said he would do: buy her flowers, candy, wish her "Happy Valentines Day", buy her diamonds and pearls, and such like, but in reality, he will be the opposite.

The thought does not really count - by the standards of the world - money does, and gifts and dainties. It is at the point where sexual performance has made a tremendous debut in determining the authenticity of a "real man." This fact may not be true for all women, but its priority is beginning to rank high on the list-of-things he can do.

Many women are truly happy with attention, trust, devotion, honesty, and such like, the mental and emotional characteristics of a man. Once they recognize that physical characteristics do not satisfy that inward yearning sought for, then, and only then, does the mental and emotional characteristics come into play. Nevertheless, the world defines even these in inordinately affectionate behavior.

A man should be sensitive, is what they say; and willing to share the responsibilities equally. Able to respect a woman's decision to work and have a career outside of the home and to pursue her deepest desires and wildest dreams, if she chooses. All this in addition to raising his [their] children. In other words, a man should stop being a man, desiring manly things like respect, dignity, integrity, and responsibility, but should bow to the emotional needs and demands of the woman.

A man knows his responsibility and is willing to fulfill it, but if told how to fulfill it and how to be a man by the feminist of society, he will rebel.

When the roles of the man and the woman resort back to what a man and a woman really are, then marriage will reign once again, and love will be the force that binds that marriage.

© 2002 by Afromerica