You see someone every day that you know is going through something. Instead of thinking they either want you to do something for them or want some money, try sitting with them for a minute and start them to talking.
First of all, people do not necessarily; or always never want advice or suggestions on how to live their lives. Most people just want someone to listen to them and acknowledge their troubles. They want to know that someone else understands their situation and will not judge them.
Second, if you know you have been through a lot then there is no reason you cannot sympathize with someone who is going through something similar. Try to be positive in any suggestions you make instead of giving bad advice or advice that would land them in jail or get them a serious beat down.
Listening is the new therapy, not giving advice. The most you can do is listen and compare their situation to one of your own and think of what you would do in their situation. Always put yourself in their shoes. It helps to personalize their problems. And never offer advice unless they ask; otherwise, give them positive quotes such as "things will get better," or "consider the good in every situation."
Understanding is key. Feel their pain or anger and make the correct decision. Many of us have gone through God-knows what and would just as well keep those tragedies to ourselves, but when we see someone going through something that has changed their personality for the worse; we should discern their feelings and at least offer an ear or some company.
Lastly, if money is an issue and you know you have the money it is always a good gesture. Of course, we have those who are master manipulators at the con-game so we steer clear or hide behind our fortress of mistrust. But sometimes those barriers cause us to cast off people who actually need help. The good thing to do is offer your support and if they run game, you will know it.
© Nov. 2017
The Hidden House Negro,
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